I am smart. I am clever. I am sneaky. I can:
Go to Sam's with my parents and take the keys and the purse and detach myself from my parents and sneak to the watermelon bin and choose a watermelon (not as easy as you would think: every time I chose one, I thought, but what if it's not good? what if that one's better?) and buy the watermelon and trot out to the car (this is where the keys come in) and hide the secret watermelon under some blankets and bags of stuff and trot back into the store and wind around some aisles to throw any watchers off the track and find my parents and pretend to have been in the store the whole time, completely lost.
Today is Father's Day. There is a watermelon, under ice, knife included, in the cooler in the back of the truck. We will eat it after church. And the Principal doesn't know about it.
I am a spy, super secret me!